"Isn't our life one attempt to fill a void after another? I don't know if I'm succeeding or not, but I'm trying hard."

Said by Dan Barber in the Netflix series, Chef's Table. Season 1, Episode 2.

In the shadows of loneliness, creativity flickers.

Picture-perfect fiction.

"An area that in 1993 attracted 7,000 people annually now draws two million. As such, ramshackle Siem Reap morphed into a whistle-stop resort town. Now the city is so overstuffed that one has to wake up at 4:30am to get to Angkor before the hordes of selfie-stick-wielding tourists infest the place like ants on an anthill."

From the The Departures Guide to Cambodia in the September 2015 issue of Departures. Written by Jessica Flint.

Yikes.

Looking at a picture of pasta that's been beautifully styled and photographed invokes the same emotions as a picturesque sunset.

"'At this point in your life,' she said, 'you have to have as much fun as you can because you don't know what's coming down the road.'"

Said by Ruth Reichl in the September 15, 2015, New York Times article: Ruth Reichl Recharges in the Kitchen. Written by Kim Severson.

The 7 Train's historic subway line extension finally opened today with the debut of the 34 Street-Hudson Yards station.

The 34 Street-Hudson Yards stop officially began transporting passengers at 1pm today, making it the first new subway station in New York City since 1989. It's great that the west side of the city near 11th Avenue and 34th Street that's always usually been desolate of public transportation is now so easily accessible. Instead of having to take a cab or walk long avenue blocks, getting to the Far West Side or the Jacob Javits Center is just a quick subway ride away.

Growing up in Flushing, the 7 Train has always been northeastern Queens' public transportation lifeline into Manhattan and the entire city. Up until today, the first stop of the 7 Train had been Times Square and the last stop was Flushing Main Street. The line isn't long compared to so many other subways, but the back-and-forth shuttling between the two end points were always convenient in getting me to where I needed to go. Plus there are a multitude of stops between Times Square and Flushing Main Street to transfer and get to anywhere within the 5 boroughs. However, now the last stop of the 7 Train is no longer Times Square, but one additional stop west to the 34 Street-Hudson Yards station. I think the line extension is truly a great thing for the city, but waiting today at the Times Square platform to check it out for the first time had me feeling nostalgic.

I basically used to take the 7 Train everyday starting from college to the time when I moved out of my house in Flushing. Since I could get on at Flushing Main Street and take it straight to the last stop of Times Square in order to transfer to another line (and vice-versa when going home), my commute gave me ample time to get stuff done. Napping the entire train ride was always great because I never had to worry about missing my stop. I could just grab a seat while the train sat at Flushing Main Street to depart, and then open my eyes to find myself at the Times Square station. The commute also allowed me to get tons of reading done, whether it was for school or any personal stuff. Sometimes I actually miss having a long continuous subway ride to work for this reason. Of course with the 7 Train being mostly on an elevated track through Queens, staring out the window was always a favorite thing to do as well.

The actual new 34 Street-Hudson Yards station I visited today is quite beautiful and modern. It even had this new-car smell which I'm sure will soon dissipate and be replaced with urine as the station undergoes its very first of infinite Monday morning commutes tomorrow. Another thing I really loved was the escalator ride from the subway platform up to the level of turnstiles, which was extremely long but so cool because the angle at which it went up seemed steeper than usual and gave me a little vertigo.

Below are some pictures of the station I took today. After I rode the 7 Train from Times Square to 34 Street-Hudson Yards, I walked around the area to check out the exterior of the station and the Hudson Yards surrounding it. There's even some new parks that have been built in the area with water fountains and sitting areas that have large Jenga-like blocks for people to play with.

One funny thing to note though is that as I finished walking around Hudson Yards and entered the new station to head back, one of the escalators had already malfunctioned and was quickly being repaired. Even with the $2.4 billion price tag and today being its opening day, this is still the subway in New York City and shit always happens.

"'Cause it's a bittersweet symphony, this life.
Try to make ends meet,
You're a slave to money then you die."

From the song Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve.

Friday night with a gang of girls. 

"I don't know.
I get so wrapped up in a world,
where nothing's as it seems."

From the song Prisoner by The Weeknd featuring Lana Del Rey.

It's impossible to walk a single block in New York right now without seeing grown-ass men who are rocking the top-knot hairstyle with the sides of their heads shaved.

This look is a trend that has become completely diluted by the countless guys who think it makes them original and cool, but in reality has categorized them as banal. What's even more funny is I just saw a group of guys where not just one but two of them had the top-knot. Shouldn't there just be 1 per group allowed to designate them as the stylish one? Talk about awkward.

With it being September 11 today, I'd like to take a moment to commemorate all of the lives lost on this tragic anniversary fourteen years ago.

Year after year passes by since 9/11, and it's so easy to forget all of the terrible events that occurred that day. Those who perished, the destruction of New York, and the everyday people all over the country who tried to make sense of what happened---there was so much going on in a world that sometimes seems so far removed from daily existence today.

I've always defined my life in two chapters; before September 11 happened, and after September 11 happened. When the planes struck the Twin Towers that Tuesday morning, I was home in Flushing, Queens. My dad was the only other person in the house at the time, and he woke me up from my stupor to tell me to come to the television because there had been a terrorist attack in New York City. This was also, literally, my first week of starting college in downtown Manhattan. I had just experienced what I now consider probably the best summer of my life, hanging out with my close group of friends on a daily basis as we transitioned from 18-year-old high school graduates as the class of 2001, to the beginning of our adult lives as upcoming college freshman. 

The summer of 2001 was a period in my life that I will forever treasure for a multitude of reasons, but mostly because of the innocence my friends and I had that we so naively never recognized. Those hot months were filled with countless nights of hanging out at each other's houses, loitering in the big municipal parking lot at Flushing's Main Street, going into Manhattan to party at clubs until sunrise, sneaking beer and booze into Karaoke bars, and driving around both day and night in Flushing and Bayside with the radio blasting. This was summertime before smart phones and social media, where we happily lived in our bubble as 18 year olds from Queens.

On that fateful Tuesday morning of September 11, 2001, I didn't want to get out of bed when my dad attempted to wake me up because I had just dyed the front part of my hair blue. I had been planning to hide it for as long as possible because I was terrified of how my dad would react to it. I scrambled to figure out a way to cover it up in my room that morning, and can clearly recall stalling as much as possible. My dad continued to yell at me to get up to watch the tv, and I was relieved when he said nothing about the arbitrary baseball cap on my head as I emerged from my room. And then we saw the footage of the two planes flying into the World Trade Center---and things never really ever seemed the same again. 

After the attack, New York changed overnight in so many ways. But even with all of the loss in the city, there was also this sense of unity that made it feel like we could now endure anything as long as we did it together. We were resilient. We were stronger. We were a country united. We were a city united. 

I currently now live just blocks way from the World Trade Center, and it's like on mornings such as today where I take a moment to pause and fully grasp all that was happening around this neighborhood fourteen years ago. To all of those who died on September 11, today we remember you. To all of the brave American men and women in the military who died fighting for our freedom since then, today we remember you.

It's way past 5am and I have been tossing and turning in bed for many hours.

While the fact that I can't sleep is driving me nuts, a moment of awareness and clarity about something just came to me... and I am so grateful for it.

Drinking until I fall asleep is better than any bedtime story.

"WE GON' BE ALRIGHT."

From the song Alright by Kendrick Lamar.

"Just keep drinking. It's better than yoga."

Said by the character Abigail in the series Scrotal Recall. Season 1, Episode 4.

Being preoccupied over food all-day is utterly exhausting.

"I can't feel my face when I'm with you,
but I love it."

From the song Can't Feel My Face by The Weeknd.

The sun sets earlier and earlier by the day.

So long, summer...

"Sometimes... you make a mistake. You got've two choices: you live with it, or you fix it."

Said by the character Max in the Netflix series, Sense8. Season 1, Episode 10.

In college, I commuted from my house in Flushing, Queens. This was an era when most books were still read as actual paper books, making my schoolbag usually really heavy. I always carried around at minimum a few magazines, school books, and most likely a book I was reading on my own. Because my commute was an hour-and-a-half one way, I made sure to have a selection of different reading material available at all times. There's nothing worst than being stuck on the subway---or anywhere for that matter---without something good to read. On a lot of days I would be out and walking around with all this stuff from morning until I got back home to Queens at night. The books and magazines often tossed around in my bag and endured a lot of wear and tear throughout the day. No matter how hard I attempted to keep them in good condition, it wasn't a surprise if some of them got damaged as they traveled with me to school, work, internships, or a late night out with friends. The weight of lugging everything around all day was easy to get used to, and after a while it grew into something I appreciated. It became a reminder of different things, and if my bag ever felt too light, I always noticed.

Nowadays, I'll normally only carry around one book and maybe a magazine. My selection is kept lighter due to the fact that I commit myself to reading one book at a time, and also because of my smartphone. For the one book that I always have, I figured out a simple solution in keeping them from getting messed up. While it doesn't have to fight for space in my bag with pounds of other reading material, my one book can sometimes take me a bit of time to finish. And the longer I tote it around, its condition is more likely to worsen. That's why a year ago, I started to keep my books in a gallon size Ziploc freezer bag. Doing so has made a tremendous difference. Now my books never have their corners bent while in my bag, and I don't worry about anything spilling onto them. The covers also don't get damaged and the edge of the pages always remain intact.

Last week on Thursday, I was in a taxi with a friend heading to Brooklyn after a late night out in the East Village. We were going to their house so I could crash, and my friend had had a bit too much to drink. At some point as we both sat in the backseat of the SUV, they told me they were going to be sick and had to barf. Being in the back of a moving car, we were totally unprepared for this. But that's when I reached into my tote bag, and pulled out the book I was reading from its huge Ziploc bag. It was just at the right moment because that's when my friend began to vomit profusely into it, until the bag was a little less than half filled. When we finally got out of the cab, I can remember feeling the weight of the freezer bag in my hand as we stood on the sidewalk. It was heavy. In a twisted way, it made me think that when Ziploc bags ordinarily have a mass like that, it's usually a good thing. To have that much leftovers or food would be a meal, but this was something completely different. This is how bags of throw-up end up in trash cans on the streets of New York.

"Tell her that the only way her heart will mend,
is when she learns to love again."

From the song Call Your Girlfriend by Robyn.

You can't always figure it out on your own. 

Sometimes, some guidance is necessary.

A day without stress in New York City usually means you're dead.

"Marcy Borders, who became known as the 'dust lady' from a defining picture of her covered in ash and grime on Sept. 11, 2001, died on Monday. She was 42.

Her sister, Dawn Borders, said she died from stomach cancer."

From the August 26, 2015, New York Times article: Marcy Borders, 'Dust Lady' Who Survived 9/11, Dies at 42. By Jonah Bromwich.

So sad. Rest in peace, Marcy.

P.
A.
S.
T.
A.

"Ian: Eddie, you need to apply yourself. If you keep looking for shortcuts, you'll never realize your potential.
Eddie: Where'd you learn that? Oprah?
Ian: Barney---on Oprah."

From the sitcom Fresh Off the Boat. Season 1, Episode 10.

It's been two years since I returned to New York, and five years since I initially left it for a break.

It's not really a big deal but numbers like that can sometimes tell a story. Or maybe they don't.

"After years of stiff benches and backless chairs, the booth is back."

From the September 2015 issue of Bon Appétit magazine. 

This is the best issue of Bon Appétit that I have ever read. There's so much great content and interesting stories.

It's funny when you realize that a favorite childhood 90's Korean pop song of yours was ripped off a Carpenters song.

"I look at you, looking at me.
I know you know how I feel."

From the song High By the Beach by Lana Del Rey.

Dear friends,

Please check out my latest story for VICE's food channel MUNCHIES: The Enduring Appeal of Stealing Tiki Mugs.

Thanks.

What's happened at the Erawan Shrine is just terrible. Looking at the pictures of it online is saddening on so many levels, because that was always such a place of peace and tranquility.

The Erawan Shrine is a temple in the very center of Bangkok, where Rama 1 and Ratchadamri intersect. This is literally in the middle of everything---a busy intersection as Central World, Gaysorn, the Royal Thai Police Headquarters, BTS stations, Skywalk and so many other major institutions remain accessible steps away. The temple was a major destination for different types of races, religions and people, from those who unexpectedly discover it while heading to a nearby destination, to groups of tourists or locals on their way home after work at a nearby mall. Stepping into the outdoor temple in the heart of Thailand's Capital city was like entering a space of serenity in all the madness. Back when I lived in Bangkok, I can't even count the number of times I stood on the Skywalk right next to the temple and felt joy while watching the people inside, as they appeared completely transported to a place of light and hope. There were oftentimes ceremonies held in it as well. It was teeming with life and spirit, and now it's also a place where people died while observing such a personal moment.

It's all so tragic. My thoughts and prayers go out to those who died and were injured.

Stay strong, Bangkok.

Nice spot to get work done.

Tune it out.

"All I wanna do is get high by the beach.
Get high by the beach. 
Get high."

From the song High by the Beach by Lana Del Rey.

"I've never felt better, and my self-esteem has grown a lot. I don't really care what other people think about me, because as long as I'm creating value and being positive about things, then what can anyone say?"

Said by Courtney Love in the August 2015 issue of Harper's Bazaar.

Today was one of those cool August Sundays in New York that epitomizes summer.

The nice temperature and breeze made being outside feel like you were being embraced with spectacular weather. It's probably because I rarely wear shorts but the air on my legs felt great and relaxed me. With it being August, the city also felt a bit emptier on the streets since so many people are at the beach or away somewhere. I laid out in the shade at Union Square park with a magazine, and then headed to Washington Square Park for a bit. There were some jazz bands playing at different parts of the park so I sat and listened. Everyone around seemed to truly be enjoying themselves. Then I wandered around for a while before eventually walking home. Glorious New York summer day.

"Without reading the text,
know what cones next.
Seen it before, 
and it's painful."

From the song The Sun & The Rainfall by Depeche Mode.

"Russ: This is stupid. You're better than this.

AJ: We both know that that's not true."

From the FX show Married. Season 2, Episode 4.

This show is hilarious. This week's episode had me cracking up.

Today I take a moment to remember you, Anne.

"Bodegas---there are around 12,000 in New York City---cannot be strictly defined. You know one when you see it."

From the August 3, 2015, New York Times article, Bodegas Declining in Manhattan as Rents Rise and Chains Grow. Written by Tatiana Schlossberg.

"There's nothing more depressing than having everything---and still feeling sad. We must learn to water our spiritual garden."

From the interlude Sad on Janet Jackson's album, The Velvet Rope.

It's such a sunny afternoon here in my apartment. With the windows and curtains open, it feels like a treat to be able to have this alone time. My roommate is currently away on vacation, so I have the whole place to myself. Of course Oscar is here with me as well, so it's just the two of us hanging out. Today is my first day with no one here because my sister and brother-in-law were over yesterday with their dog. All I ever need is alone time in a quiet place with my computer, and I feel like myself again. No other place I need to be, no obligations, no television, no distractions. It's just some music on for background noise and my laptop.

Pasta is my everything.

What good is a fun night out if you can't remember it the next morning?

"I feel like you never want to marry someone that's too fun."

Said by the character Russ Bowman in the tv show Married. Season 2, episode 3.

Congratulations to my friends Ricky and Susy on the birth today of their beautiful baby girl, Amelia! It was just 9 days ago when Susy told me how happy she was being pregnant and spending so much bonding-time with Amelia. This was when I had gone to Astoria to visit the expecting couple on a quiet Sunday, catching up and thinking about all that was to come. And now Amelia has finally joined her parents and rest of the world, for this journey we're all in together.

As we get older, it's the babies and little ones who keep the group growing and learning.

My three subscriptions to food magazines all arrived in the mail today on the same day. That's a first!

"I'm going to crack like nobody's watching, and eat like I skipped lunch."

Said by a voiceover in a recent Red Lobster commercial.

This past weekend had me pretty busy with my best friend's birthday dinner and then a wedding the next night on Saturday.

Happy birthday to Junho! Judy and I took the birthday boy to Virginia's for dinner on Friday, and then went to nearby Mother of Pearl for drinks. After that we bar hopped for a bit, and ended up back at our apartment by 3am stuffing our faces with just-delivered takeout. There was also banana cream pie thanks to Judy. Basically, when I woke up the next morning my legs felt so heavy it was hard to lift them.

Being able to attend a wedding is always special, and I felt so fortunate to have gone to Esther and Mike's this past Saturday. It took place downtown in Battery Park, right by the beautiful water where you could see the Statue of Liberty. Their ceremony was lovely and perfectly matched the couple in every way. Witnessing their vows was so great, as their love for one another filled the room. Being there helped remind me of so many things that are easily forgotten as a single person. Another thing to note is Esther's the same age as me and also grew up in Queens. We had a lot of mutual friends in high school, and she did a joint sweet sixteen birthday party with a friend of mine at the time. The party took place at Flushing's Kum Gang San, and this memory of Esther at 16 standing behind the birthday cake has been burned into my mind since then.

Thinking of that memory at her and Mike's wedding really had me happy for them, I wish them all the best in their new chapter. Congratulations to the husband and bride!

"'Promise me that you'll never let anyone steal your joy': Sunday night at Barclays Center in Brooklyn, Nicki Minaj was convening her faithful, guiding them through whatever storms they'd been weathering."

From the July 27, 2015, New York Times article Review: Nicki Minaj Raps Life Lessons at Barclays Center, by Jon Caramanica.

Dear friends,

Please check out my latest write-up for VICE's food channel MUNCHIES: I've Been Tipped in Gold Nuggets, 8-Balls and Three-Way Wedding Proposals.

Thank you.

There's so much going on in the country right now... some of it is really heartbreaking. 

Dear Mayonnaise,

I love you so much.

Sincerely,

thwany

"Tell our story, Christian. Promise me. Promise me."

Said by the character Satine in the movie Moulin Rouge.

Stay busy.

"It's slim pickings out there. You can't swing a Fendi purse without knocking over 5 losers. Where did all the great guys go?"

Said by the character Samantha in Sex In The City. Season 2, Episode 13.

"Miranda: Maybe you should think about running to a shrink.
Carrie: Why should I pay someone when we can talk for free and then go get a drink or whatever. I don't need professional help, I've got you guys."

From the show Sex In The City. Season 2, Episode 13.

"Guess it's true, I'm not good at a one night stand.
But I still need love 'cause I'm just a man.
These nights never seem to go to plan.
I don't want you to leave, will you hold my hand?"

From the song Stay With Me by Sam Smith.

Lately, I've been going through too many long periods where my life seems filled with distractions that might seem fun, but in the end they almost always result in nothing.

I've fallen into this routine of going to work, then either boozing it up afterwards or coming straight home to spend an unnecessary amount of time in front of the television.

When I go too long without reading, discovering new music, watching a good film, or wandering an unexplored street or neighborhood by foot, it becomes mindlessly easy to live in a mundane world where creativity and inspiration has no place. That's why reading a good book or listening to an album that moves me or experiencing a film that makes me feel something or walking down an unknown New York block that transports me to another place is so important to do.

Ultimately, each medium does the same thing in a different way. That instant where the imagination is sparked is what keeps me going, and the dots of life should be connected from moment-to-moment like those instead of trudging along each day without thinking twice about what's actually going on, and that this is life and it needs to be lived.

Day-to-day responsibilities are important. Socializing is important. Art is important. Without balance, it all means nothing.

"Finally,
it has happened to me.
Right in front of my face,
and I just can not hide it."

From the song Finally by CeCe Peniston.

Chase that feeling...

Scaffolding on a quiet street of New York can become really beautiful on a rainy night.

I just want to eat chicken over rice with extra white sauce everyday for lunch.

But that's not practical.

"Not even they can stop me now."

From the song Radio by Lana Del Rey.

Write. Write. Write. Write!
Right. Right. Right. Right?

"Always. 
Always. 
Always.
Always. 
Always, always."

From the song Always by Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Happy 4th of July, America!

There are these moments that occasionally happen where things just have to be paused for a second to be taken in and really appreciated. It could be something so simple or something that's once in a lifetime, but to recognize what's going on really helps look at things with a new perspective. This moment of right here and right now will never happen again. But this exhilaration can be achieved again by perhaps reaching a goal in life or living happily and fulfilled everyday.