Is there anything more beautiful than a blank sheet of paper that's been covered with words?

My brain keeps telling me it's mid-June.

These two baby kittens were recently just discovered in the backyard of where I live. 

They're still so fragile and can't be more than a few weeks old. Any caregiver or parent of theirs is nowhere to be found, so my roommates and I have been trying to make sure they stay nourished and healthy.

Aren't they so adorable?

"Well I know what's right---
I got just one life.
In a world that keeps on pushing me around,
I stand my ground."

From the song I Won't Back Down by Tom Petty.

Tell me something I don't know.

You can cry on my shoulder.

"But the heart that I brought was what people felt, and my ability to be myself. The lesson that that taught me, and has taught me over the years: anybody pretending to be anything other than who you really are, you will never ever reach your personal potential."

From Oprah Presents Master Class on the OWN Network.

Sometimes the universe gives you these amazing gems at 12:10 in the afternoon when you're just channel surfing and trying to figure out some things in your life.

This song will always remind me of you.

Somebody pass the chill pills.

Good morning.

Make today matter.

The wedding of my roommates this past weekend was the first that I've attended in years, and it's got me doing a lot of thinking about life and relationships.

I'm 30 years old and have yet to ever be in a serious relationship... I mean, I don't know what it is. I'm a good person, and I've tried to sincerely meet others... but I must be some sort of un-dateable outcast or something.

I'm still trying to figure out what it's all about.

Humility.

I lost count on how many times I called myself a loser today.

"I heard it all before.
I heard it all before.
I heard it all before.
I heard it all before.
I heard it all before."

From the song Sorry by Madonna.

It's funny when you first meet someone and think they're totally normal, but then you realize they're really weird.

My good friends/roommates just got married! 

Congratulations to Jenn and Daniel for such a beautiful ceremony and fun weekend of commemorating. Celebrating their union these last three days with their family and friends felt like one long party, and it was so great to be able to take part in the festivities.

It's too bad that I didn't take as many photos as I would have liked, but hey, it's hard to think about any of that when you're having too much of a good time. Being a part of the wedding party was also a blast, and it felt so great to see Judy out here in California as well.

Happy Memorial Day weekend!

This song reminds me of you.

"What's another sunny day
without you?
Just another 24
that passes by."

From the song Sunny Day by Brandy.

It sure is hard to get a date around here.

"Life is short."

It's funny how I've heard this adage a number of times in the past 24 hours.

Yes, life is short---so let's live it.

Magazines are the best.

Staying in all day makes me obsess over food.

I need to do some walking on my days off but there's nowhere to even go...

The proof is in the pudding.

LA is not a city for loners.

I want to feel...

LA = helicopters galore.

Songs are memories, and it's not always going to be the right moment to relive things.

"We say goodbye in the pouring rain,
And I break down as you walk away.
Stay, stay.
'Cause all my life I've felt this way,
But I could never find the words to say.
Stay, stay."

From the song Stay by Hurts.

"Dear God,
I'm writing this letter to You
'Cause I don't have a clue
Can You help me?"

From the song Letter to God by Hole.

It's interesting how it's so normal to walk by any house or down any street in LA to get whiffs of marijuana being so openly smoked.

Ahh, medicinal marijuana...

Good morning.

Time sure flies.

Here's an old video from March 2011 that I made for my sister. It was after an overnight bus ride from Bangkok to Nong Khai, and I was on the search for some breakfast.

I can't remember what I ended up eating though.

Be conscious of how you define yourself.

Never before in life have I ever appreciated bags of frozen vegetables as much as I do now.

And butter. Lots and lots of butter.

I just want to eat and eat, and then eat and eat on top of eating some more.

The weather in LA has definitely been getting noticeably hotter. It's like you step outside and can already feel the sun starting to burn your skin.  

I started taking public transportation here, and it's been great because I feel like gained some freedom back into my life. Depending on other people for rides is something I just have always hated, so riding public transportation growing up back in NYC is just what I'm used to. Exploring by bus out here in Los Angeles has been really good for me. It's really given me the ability to survey the city and get a better sense of its energy. And thankfully, I live in a somewhat central part of town and have been able to figure out how to get to Hollywood, Venice, Little Tokyo, and other spots from where I am. It's funny though because when I did finally get myself to take the bus out here for the very first time, a thought crossed my mind as I sat at a window seat by myself. Sitting down and staring out the window as the bus revved along under me felt so comfortable and familiar, and in a way I just felt like my self again. (Yeah, I know I'm a loser). The last time I had been on a city bus was back in Bangkok, and over there I was completely independent. Things are a bit different out here in LA, and there's definitely no way for me to get around comfortably to where I want to go to without a car. I mean, I accept that about it here and acknowledge that I'm the loser who's waiting for the bus. But still, taking the bus allows me to get to work and some other random places, and I'm grateful for that. There's also this car service app that my friend introduced me to, so it's nice to have options I guess. One thing however that I am experiencing for the first time is that the lack of tall buildings and trees in LA---except for the Downtown area---doesn't provide any shade. The clear blue background creates nice stark lines in the sky, but my skin however is more tan than it ever was even back in Bangkok. You know, I'm starting to appreciate and understand LA more, but one thing is that I'm not the type of person who needs to see the sun every day. But on most days, you wake up and bam, there it is again. 

Here's to the blue skies of Los Angeles.

"Take me out tonight
Where there's music and there's people
And they're young and alive."

From There Is A Light That Never Goes Out by The Smiths.

This is for you, LA.

"A mind so complex.
It's breaking her neck.
She think she's a car driving to its own wreck."

From the song Girl by Frente!

Things that I'm certain of right now:

• Sometimes, there's just no time (or point in) bullshitting. 
• I've truly learned my lesson. Trying to date and meet people online or through apps will never work for me. My effort was always sincere, but it's time to really just move on and stop with it. I just can't deal with interacting like that with people I've never met in real life before. There's just too many who act and represent themselves in ways that are annoying to put up with.
• A long fun night of dancing and release is very much needed.
• I really need to converse and connect. 
• The sense of warmth from another body is something that seems hard to recall nowadays.
• That ultimately, some things are just so pointless.

It feels SO DAMN great to finally have a job and work again.

Thank you, L.A.!

Kyung-Ah noona was just in town from Seoul for work.

It was great catching up with her at a fun Jamaican-inspired restaurant near Venice Beach called Sunny Spot.