Sunday, November 16, 2014

Sometimes, 5am can feel just the same as 11pm to me. I'm not sure what sort of weird internal clock I was born with, but I've come to somewhat fully accept my lifelong sleep issues as a part of who I truly I am. There's no sleeping pill, breathing exercise, diet or routine that has ever been a dependable solution to my insomnia, and so here I am typing.

When I was living abroad in Thailand for years, I often went long periods without the Internet. The connection at my apartment was so outrageously slow and undependable, that I couldn't bear myself to pay for it any longer. I would spend more time trying to get a connection rather than being connected, and so I learned to live without it.

Instead, I would go somewhere in the daytime that had wifi, and download as much stuff on my iPad as possible to use for that night. I never had a television during my 2 years in Bangkok either, so my studio apartment was nice and mellow. I normally just listened to music and read, or sat on my balcony smoking a joint and daydreamed. Then when I discovered the magic of downloadable podcasts, the voice of Terry Gross and so many others often soothed me late into the night. When I first learned about downloadable podcasts, it really did help me so much. I was living in a foreign country alone, had no Internet or TV, no one to talk to, no smartphone, and basically no form of leisurely distraction to help pass the time. Listening to podcasts changed all that, both at home or while I was out. I used to ride the bus everywhere all over the city to get to where I needed, and podcasts got me through countless hours of insane Bangkok traffic. Even to this day, when I listen to Snap Judgement, it totally brings me back to staring out the windows of air conditioner-less buses with so much hustle and bustle happening around me.

Now that I've been back in New York living with a smartphone, I definitely still enjoy listening to podcasts. However, with access to high-speed wifi at home (along with so many other choice distractions), it's hard to get around to it sometimes when I can read the news or re-download an old video purchase from iTunes.

But nevertheless, there's nothing better than listening to a good podcast to fall asleep to---no matter where I am in the world.

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