for any Yukio Mishima fans out there, the film forum in nyc on houston is playing paul schrader's 1985 film, mishima: a life in four chapters.

this film is only playing for a week, and i caught the sunday evening show at 7 pm. i have to say that the film is beautiful and very aesthetically engaging --- the scenery and sets are vibrant with color and are really inspiring at times. one scene will go from a cafe where all the characters are wearing hyper bright, bubble-gum colored clothing and make up, and then it will go to a very dark and morbid black and white scene. the music for the movie was also really spectauclar and enhanced the movie very well. while i'm not too knowledgeable on philip glass and his work, i have heard some other stuff he's composed and i enjoy his music very much. the movie also changed my views on mishima himself, who was a very radical man that was deeply invested in bringing the japanese military to the superpower it once was generations ago and doing away with capitalism.

while i might not agree with his views on that, his writing speaks for itself and i don't know anyone who could read any of his books and not appreciate the beauty in his gift with words --- i wish i could write like him.

this movie is only playing until dec 23, so there's still a few more days to go watch it. if anyone catches it, let me know what you thought of it.



well, i've got to get up for work in a few hours so i'm going to try and go to sleep for the millionth time tonight.

i'm not going to write about how lonely i am anymore. well- i'm at least going to try not to.

let's focus on the all the good stuff in life, shall we? i'm happy at work, i truly feel blessed to be where i am. man, just a month and a half ago, i was jobless and without any direction in my life. while i'm still without direction, i do have a great job to keep me busy until i figure out exactly what it is i want to do.

i'm starting to get into Yukio Mishima.

has anyone else read his books? there's something about Russian and Japanese authors that i've always felt a deep connection with.

anyhoo, i'm currently reading Mishima's, confessions of a mask, and i'm thoroughly enjoying it. some say that it's highly autobiographical, and after doing some research on mishima, i truly feel it is. and with that being said, it's clear that he was gay. it's interesting because as the "character" in the book recounts his childhood and some of the homosexual thoughts and feelings he had, it brought me back to my own experiences while growing up. i started to remember all the different emotions and thoughts i had completely forgotten about, and it made me wonder how i survived growing up.

i like his writing, it's simple and fluid, yet still manages to show the complexity of the inner dialogue that the character struggles with.

aside from mishima, there's nothing special going on in my life that is worth mentioning here.

blahh.