Good morning, world.

I’ve been thinking about what you said...

"I knew that I was on the right path."

Said by Mashama Bailey in the Netflix show Chef's Table. Season 6, Episode 1.

"I found that the heart of many relationships are surrounded by a meal. It really cemented what I think life is and what I want out of life."

Said by Mashama Bailey in the Netflix show Chef's Table. Season 6, Episode 1.

"I've gotta be me."

Said by Sammy Davis, Jr in an episode of PBS' American Masters titled Sammy David, Jr: I've Gotta Be Me.

Gone.
Gon’.
Gun.

"This isn't the time to pipe whipped cream. This is the time to just slather it on."

Sad by Ina Garten in the show Barefoot Contessa: Back to Basics. Season 13, Episode 5.

"Just, like, get all of the caramel from the pan. You don't want to leave any behind."

Said by Ina Garten in her show Barefoot Contessa: Back to Basics. Season 13, Episode 4.

"By the time the night is over, whatever was bothering me, I'm feeling great."

Said by Phelicia in the HBO documentary United Skates.

A word.
Award.
Uh, weird.

Put cash in the tip jar when no one is looking.

Today, I turn 36.

The way a person celebrates their birthday is always a good indicator of who they are, and where they're at in their life for that year. I feel like for me, my annual observances have just gotten quieter with time. They fade more into the background as the responsibilities of everyday living have piled up. I'm not into calling any big get-togethers because the dedication those require are put aside for those milestones of a new a spouse, child, or mortgage. But I'm totally fine with that. Because I'm more interested in seeing most of my friends throughout the rest of the year, when catching up isn't just about a birthday, but the other important things that happen between each one. You know, because of my lack of spouse, child, mortgage, and all.

"Can I get a falafel with hot sauce, a side of baba ganoush, and a seltzer, please?"

Said by Mary in the movie Party Girl.

Your void runneth over.

The journey of a word.

Dear friends,

Please check out a story I wrote for Condé Nast's LGBTQ magazine called them.

My story is titled: This Trans Woman is Changing the Face of Queer Nightlife in Korea

"Hae-mi: Then are you a writer?
Jong-Su: Not officially. I'm trying to become one."

From the movie Burning.

It shows.

Food works.

The past few weeks or so.

Hey.

The building's point of view is of you stomping down the sidewalk everyday.

Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night from such vivid and emotional dreams where I don't know what to do with myself. I just lie there in bed, not sure about anything.

"Ain't my fault that I'm out here getting loose.
Gotta blame it on the Goose.
Gotta blame it on my juice, baby."

From the song Juice by Lizzo.

I’d like to smell this tray of truffles from dinner at Atomix all day, everyday. 

I want to take you with me... let’s go together.

Dear Memes,
you make life seem,
so agleam,
like a dream,
bringing smiles and laughter to the extreme,
because so much of each day is a fight upstream,
where struggles demean,
but your joy tastes as delicious as ice cream.

Whenever I interact with someone else who has adult braces like myself, I'll usually try to make small talk with them. I'll casually just ask a simple question about how they like having them or how much longer until they're done with it.

I went to Herald Square today to run an errand and buy something. And while I was being rung up, I noticed that the nice young lady behind the counter had braces so I sparked a conversation about them. She was super friendly, and I also saw that she was working the register with her left hand while pressing into her right jaw with a few fingers on her other hand. She then began to tell me about how she has to go in for an emergency check-up with her orthodontist because some of her brackets broke and the wiring on her braces were messed up. When I asked about what happened, she told me just had just gotten punched in the face the other day. I stood there a bit stunned and immediately asked, "You got punched?! How? Why?" "I was just walking down the street and this girl punched me. I live in the Bronx," she replied. She didn't seem angry or upset, but was more telling me in a matter-of-fact way. I couldn't believe this random act of violence that happened to her, and felt terrible about it. "I'm in pain though, and that's why I'm pressing into my jaw like this right now," she added. I again expressed my sympathy and she smiled and said she'll totally be fine. Even though this had happened to her, she was still at work with a great attitude, and providing professional customer service. I appreciated it so much that for the first time ever, I went to the website listed on the receipt to take one of those special surveys about my shopping experience.

To the girl that helped me today, I wish you all the best.

Validation.

Preparation.

The local news on television reporting on the weather is seriously always so dramatic.

“If you are reading this, and you’re a writer, and you, like me, are gripped with despair, when you think you might stop: Speak to your dead. Write for your dead. Tell them a story. What are you doing with this life? Let them hold you accountable. Let them make you bolder or more modest or louder or more loving, whatever it is, but ask them in, listen, and then write.”

From the book How to Write an Autobiographical Novel by Alexander Chee. Page 270.

Is this what people do?

Oh, this is what people do.

"To truly know someone is to be fully aware of their inner lives, the people whose lives made their lives possible, and the context through which they have survived. There's much we don't know about each other."

From the book No Ashes in the Fire by Darnell L. Moore. E-book version page 35.

"If you believe in yourself enough,
and know what you want,
you're gonna make it happen."

From the song Make It Happen by Mariah Carey.

The past few weeks or so.

"엄마, 아빠, 사랑해!"

Said by Sandra Oh in her Golden Globes acceptance speech for the 2019 best Actress in a Drama TV Series award.

Hearing this expressed by a winner at a major American award show is something I've fantasized about my entire life... wow, what a moment.

Congratulations to Sandra Oh on your win. Keep doing your thing and making us proud.

"Dancing,
and prancing.
Grooving,
keep on moving.
Flying,
stop your crying.
Choosing,
while you're cruising.

Music is the answer,
to your problems.
Keep on moving,
then you can solve them."

From the song Music is the Answer by Danny Tenaglia ft Celeda.

Connecting with nature in NYC means going into a pet store and making eye contact with lizards, birds, and guppies.

Time heals all pasta binges.

Sometimes, a stranger on the bus or subway can seem so normal until you learn that they’re the type of asshole who puts their shopping bags on the seat next to them as they avoid eye contact with the world by staring down into their phone. These people are the worst.

It's so weird how University Place right below 14th Street changed the direction of its traffic all of a sudden. The street used to be a one-way block that went from south to north, but now it goes in the opposite way. I was crossing it just now and got so confused.

The only thing I'm truly nosey about is what restaurant you ate at.

U.G.L.Y. = Unbothered Gay Living, Yes!

A way.
Away.
Awake.

Too much free time to look back in life hurts my neck.

I'm only staring straight forward from now on.

I have these odd days where my shoelaces inexplicably come undone constantly.

Happy New Year!

I stayed in last night and drank at home, and was pretty much out cold in bed by 11pm. I think it's the second year in a row where I've done that.

2019 is the year of the pig, which is the animal of my birth year of 1983. Not only does the year of the pig come around once every 12 years, but 2019's is apparently extra special and prosperous because it's the year of the golden pig, which only happens once every 60 years.

I'm looking forward to using the luck from that in addition to some hard work to accomplish some great things.

"Nobody knows enough to be pessimistic."

Said by Daniel Goleman in the podcast Oprah's Super Soul Conversation. Episode Emotional Intelligence 101.

Spontaneity... give it to me.

"I opened up to you and you judged me. You are an asshole."

Said by Tiffany Maxwell in the movie Silver Linings Playbook.

Did anyone show up?

"My skin, very Mexican, very Oaxaqueñan and very human. From the color of my land and diversity of its colors. Lights, cameras, red carpets, magazine covers. It is for hope, it is to shed light on where you are from, it is to inspire."

Said by Yalitza Aparicio Martínez in her Vogue México video interview.

Everything is a challenge. But some are not worth your time.

"The gurgle of whiskey pouring into the glass was music to my ears. Like an old friend opening his heart to me."

From the book Killing Commendatore by Haruki Murakami. Page 445.

Secret Santa with friends last night in Brooklyn.

Plan it.
Planet.

Good morning!

Rein in your expectations.
Rain on your expectations.

Eat before sleeping.

The January 2019 cover of Vogue México featuring Yalitza Aparicio Martínez is everything.

"Things ended as they so often do in this era, with an unanswered text."

From the December 14, 2018, New York Times Modern Love column titled: Your Dog Has Seen Me Naked. By Ryan Pfeffer.

I just want to go watch Danny Tenaglia spin and dance for six hours straight.

As an alumni of The New School, I utilize the free lifetime access to their buildings a lot. It's pretty much the only place I have to get work done in the city. Coffee shops and libraries are too crowded and leave me worried about stepping away for a second to use the bathroom. And my place in Harlem is so small that I can't even fit my desk in my room, allowing no solitude for my thoughts. It makes concentrating at home really difficult. Seeing that I'm still paying off my student loans, I will happily come to The New School campus as much as possible stay here for hours with my computer.

It's a rainy and dreary Sunday here in New York today. I decided to forgo my usual favorite spot in the university's main building for a place on an upper floor instead. It's amazing how different life seems from a much higher view. It's like another world opens up. All the movement and people on the street level seems so much smaller. Floors upon floors of nearby buildings reveal entirely new habitats with each peek through an apartment window. Each living quarter has so much personality and character. Meals are had, lights in different rooms flicker on and off, and day-to-day life is lived. It's all so fascinating to observe, and provides a much needed reminder about perspective. There's just so much more out there than what I know and see in my own daily existence.

"I set the water to boil, warmed the asparagus-and-bacon sauce in a pan, and threw together a quick salad of lettuce, tomato, onion, and green peppers. When the water boiled, I tossed in the pasta and diced some parsley while it cooked."

From the book Killing Commendatore by Haruki Murakami. Page 351.

"'Why don't you stay for lunch?' I asked the the two of them. 'I can whip up a pasta and salad in no time.'"

From the book Killing Commendatore by Haruki Murakami. Page 351.

"Somehow, I had to believe, I would gain not only knowledge but wisdom, too."

From the book When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi. Page 50.

Sometimes, it feels nice to sit on a New York City park bench on a winter night.

Everyone else around is too cold to do anything else other than briskly walk by, so I appreciate the space and alone time.

"Am I ever embarrassed about anything that I do? No."

Said by Cardi B in her December 9, 2018 interview with CBS Sunday Morning.

I can't tell if you just love complaining about this, or truly don't want a solution?