What do you do when you see the name of a new popular book that's one word off from the title of a short story you've had in your head for years?

Kick yourself really hard. And move on.

Whenever in need of retail therapy or some instant gratification, I look no further than the "Cookbooks Under $5" section on iBooks. It's updated throughout the week, and there are always cookbooks from major publishing companies and big time chefs/restaurateurs on sale!

Leave it to the kind employees of an Apple Store Genius Bar to give you an ear complex.

Since the days of the original iPod, earphones that usually come with Apple products have never really fit my ears. Their design has always been too awkward for my natural shape, and would fall out or simply never felt right. This lead me to trying lots of different earphones over the years, but about a month ago I decided to give one from Apple a go.

I purchased the Apple-In Ear Headphones that come with silicone tips, which usually always work well for me. I was happy with the new pair, and everything seemed fine. I even noticed how different it felt to go about my day using white earphones from Apple like most of the world---it was like I was finally a part of modern civilization. But then a few weeks later, I began to have issues with the left side. Anytime I attempted to pull the earphone out, the silicone tip would come unattached from the wire, leaving it it sitting in my ear canal. After days of dealing with extracting it out with my fingertips, I decided to go to the Apple store to return them for a new pair.

I've been dog-sitting Oscar for the past few days, so I decided to exchange them at the Apple Store in the Upper West Side. When the nice associate at the Genius Bar began assisting me, I explained how the left side was defective, and I just wanted a new pair. Since the sound quality was still fine, I inquired if my issue was something he saw often, which he responded to as no. I demonstrated how the silicone tip would remain sitting in my ear when I pulled at the wire. But when he tested the same thing on his own ears, the earphones did not have the same issue. After a bit more assessment, he recommended a full refund rather than an exchange. When I pressed him for more info, he said that because of my ear shape, this problem would most likely happen again. And when I explained my history of having ill-matched ears for Apple earphones, the whole thing just made sense. It was then when I realized: Apple products and my ears just aren't meant to be.

I know there are tons of other earphone options for me to try, but I can't say that I wasn't a teeny-tiny bit bummed leaving the store. To come to the conclusion that this relationship will never happen, well, okay Apple, I finally hear you.

"Just... two people that like warm rolls."

Said by Melvin in the movie As Good As It Gets.

"When he found out I was a writer he gradually began to reveal more personal details. He may have felt that, like therapists and religious leaders, writers had a legitimate right (or duty) to hear people's confessions."

From the short story, An Independent Organ, in the book Men Without Women by Haruki Murakami. Page 91.

Day One (attempt XXXXX).

"I associate many things with many things."

Said by the character Watson in the movie Desk Set.

Ew.

At the end of the month, I'll be moving out of my place here in Woodside, Queens. Yes, another year, and another different living situation. I've lost track of the number of times I've moved as an adult---it's too overwhelming to try and even think about.

I guess the good news is that I'm leaving my current living situation for a more positive reason this time. On June 1st, I'll be going to Seoul for two months. I''ll be heading over there to work on a writing project. The entire thing is beyond exciting, and I am so ready to get the fuck out of New York for a bit. I've never been into weekend vacations or traveling for short stints. I've always just preferred longer periods of immersing myself somewhere instead, so I do see my upcoming trip as a much needed blessing that's necessary for my sanity. It's funny because it was seven years ago around this time of year when I decided to drop everything here in New York and head to Korea in order to look for a new job, and basically life. And now years later, I'll be going again but under completely different circumstances. This time isn't totally about running away from everything (okay, maybe just little), but more about carrying my life in the forward direction I really need to go. I'm happy, excited, and know this will help me mentally reset in a way. In general, things in life are good. But I'm in desperate need of some variety---a change from the daily routine that sometimes feels too easy to become complacent with. I needed this, badly. And I am oh, so ready for it.

Your shit sucks.

How do you not get bogged down?

How do you express yourself without focusing on the possibility of it being misunderstood?

How do you react when the negativity catches you off guard?

How do you refrain from destroying MTA property after yet another train delay?

How do you stop at just one?