i've been falling asleep around 7am for the past week or so. i have to sleep with this free jetblue eyemask my sister randomly gave me a year or so again because of the bright summer sun that starts to rise a little after 4am. i feel so cracked out because of my crazy sleep schedule.

dear world,

please stop copping a fucking attitude with a host/hostess at a restaurant because you're hungry and cranky. seriously, step the fuck away from my god damn space and chill out.

thank you.

i started hosting at work. apparently i'm the first ever male host at the restaurant, random. thank god this isn't one of those places where i have to wear any sort of uniform, i love that i can wear whatever the fuck i want.

so, ever since my first week of getting there, ive been running into the most random people at work: people that i've worked with, dated, people who've interviewed me for jobs, old friends i haven't seen in years, and others who i don't give 2 shits about and didn't care if i ever see again. then a few days ago i told my sister about some of the people i've been running into at work and she asked me, "aren't you a little embarrassed? you used to tell that guy what to do at work and now you're clearing plates off his table." i found what she said to be pretty hysterical and what's even funnier is, i'm not embarrassed to be working there at all. i sort of love the office-free life, it's less soul sucking.

aside from work, i don't do much. if i'm lucky, i get to hang out with all my friends and catch up on our lives.

REMEMBER THESE????

i randomly stumbled upon this at walgreens and it instantly made me think of my childhood. i've always loved these, they were always such a special treat to me.

i had a crazy nightmare last night. it was the kind that left me feeling very shaken and vulnerable when i wake up. i cant believe that it wasn't a dream and that it was actually something i dreamt. they're so random sometimes.

so in my latest nightmare, for some reason i've been kidnapped in brazil and at one point, someone is pointing a shotgun at me saying they're about to shoot me as i plead for my life. i just remember the feeling of that dream, i felt truly terrified and like i act was actually about to get shot and killed. then at another point, this small korean grandma is ordering me around and telling me what to do. i'm still kidnapped and she's ordering me around like crazy and at one point i yell in her face, "HAL-MUH-NI!!!!" and look at her like she better get the fuck up off me. i don't remember the rest.

well, it was terrifying none-the-less.

No more writing entries while stoned.

it's 2:35 am and i am currently decompressing at home after a long night at work. i got home 20 minutes ago and now i just want to shower soon and read shit online for hours or until i fall asleep. i can't go to bed without decompressing, i need to do this before i ever go to bed. i haven't blogged about work in a while, but so much has change. i actually feel like i know what the fuck i'm doing. i've already even seen new people come and go during my short time thus far, and i'm proud of myself for making it through. while it's still pretty stressful due to all the pressure of maintaining the quality of the restaurant, it's fun at the same time. anyway, my point is now i finally feel like this is my job---it's not some random place i'm at everyday anymore. i'm even starting to get used to the crazy schedules. it's nice because my off-time and days without work fall under days of the week where i can do all the shit i want in the day and not have to deal with people. i kind of like it. i had to ride the subway the other day for front-of-house staff meeting at work. when i got on the subway at 9 in the morning, i couldn't believe how many people there were. i got so used to riding the train and never hanging to deal with rush hour. it feels nice to see a train pass by us coming from the opposite direction and it's jam packed with people. that's when i sigh and am very grateful that i don't have to deal with the "daily grind" anymore. i'm not sure if other people use this, but every morning i would stand through my crowded ass commute and just say "fuck you daily grind." but now i don't have to deal with it, and i'm okay with that. off to shower and get some shut eye. i'm working a double-shift tomorrow that have sometimes been 13 hours of work with one 30 minute break. at least i'm not sitting on my fat lazy ass all day in an office, i feel a lot healthier working on my feet.