Tuesday, June 29, 2010

i'm so tired but i just can't fall asleep.

i also only slept two hours last night. i feel drunk off exhaustion when i get to this point and trying to focus is often difficult.

one day i know i'm going to end up doing something really stupid and crazy due to the fact that my mind is racing, i'm alone, it's the middle of night, i'm frustrated and in dire need of something to ease my lonely thoughts. i wish i could just tell my brain to chill out and take a break, but it doesn't want to listen. it just thinks and thinks and thinks and thinks some more.

reading helps until the point where i'm ready to put the book down and get some shut eye, but then i turn the lights off and just end up tossing and turning in bed, unable to ease into that unconscious state of happiness. sleeping pills is a definite no-no for me---been there, done that and my body is immune to them. i never know if working out in the day actually helps because it doesn't really seem to affect me when i'm trying to fall asleep later that night. watching tv is nice but i usually stay up longer when i do so. i try some creative writing sometimes but i can't ever express my thoughts on paper correctly and know when to close microsoft word and give it a rest.

hmm, i do think that some great conversation would help though.

No comments:

Post a Comment