"Um, I thought you were Mary Poppins, but you're more Mary Poppin's off."

Said by the character Jade McKellan in the Netflix show Family Reunion. Season 1, Episode 1.

Smell.
Small.

Let's laugh. Like, all the time.

I kain't.

Have you ever been at an event with mostly gay men, and then realized you're the only person in the room not wearing chunky sneakers?

I need to get my shit together.

Hello, life.

I'm still here.

All it takes is one good meme to have you smiling before bedtime.

Sweet dreamz.

Life is just chugging along.

Still okay.

I went to the post office to send my old college friend Magali something in Texas. Along with what I wanted to mail her, I had brought along some blank note cards with me so I could include a short message with her stuff. I was planning to buy an envelope for the packaging there at the post office and then quickly write her a message before getting in line to pay for everything. But then as I stood there at a side counter with a pen in hand (my own of course and not one of those chained down), and began to write "Dear Magali," I realized how novel it felt to have this contraption within my grips. It was like my hand didn't know what to do. I ripped up my first attempt because I hated how the handwriting of those two words came out, and then the same happened for the second attempt. My third attempt got me a little farther with a couple of more sentences, but I abruptly stopped soon after while thinking I just can't do this. I ended up sending her the stuff without a message or note at all, which felt weird but also okay for 2019.

"For the first few million years after the sun's birth, there are no worlds to see it rise."

From the PBS show The Planets. Episode Inner Worlds.

"I never knew love like this before."

From the song Never Knew Love Like this Before by Stephanie Mills.

We need a word for that.

"Within the densest fog and darkest black, you can find clarity and color if your imagination is 20-20."

From the July 6th, 2019, New York Times opinion piece Writing With Your Eyes Closed. By Frank Bruni.

"The sweet things in life, 

to you were just loaned.
So how can you lose what you've never owned?
Life is just a bowl of cherries,
so live and laugh at it all."

From the song Life Is Just a Bowl of Cherries by Judy Garland.

Holding hands.

I’m obsessed with the show Pose, and it’s inspired me to start my own house. I've decided it'll be named The House of Carbonara, and its primary purpose is to eat pasta while watching the show.

"That dress is so pretty, it makes my stomach hurt."

Said by Megan in the movie Bridesmaids.

It is such a beautiful and glorious Sunday in NYC today.

Think yes.
Totes yuck.
Tell you.
This year.
That's yum.
Text ya.
Then yell.
They're young.
Toss yesterday.
Thank you.

Mistakes made in slow motion reveal consequences at an unforgiving speed.

Deliberate.
Deliver it.

Pardon, but I have a 14-part question.

It was fun to dog-sit Oscar for a day over the weekend.

Happy Pride!

It's June, and that means there are a ton of LGBTQ events going on this month in celebration. I attended Queens Pride last Sunday in Jackson Heights, and that was lots of fun. I've been going to it on and off for a while now and love its crowd and vibe. Being there just feels like home in so many ways. For this past week's, I watched some of the performances and walked around a bit, and eventually ended up grabbing some food alone at the nearby UFC chicken. Luckily, I was already sitting there with my food and a beer by the time that sudden downpour came towards the early evening. It had been a while since I'd been to that UFC, too, so being there at that moment with dry socks and fried stuff as I parched my thirst with a cold one felt pretty damn good. The restaurant isn't that big, and a family of four ended up sitting next to me after I'd had already gotten my food. It was a mom, dad, young son, and grandma. From the moment that the father and son first came in ahead to get a table, they brought this burst of energy that moved me. I basically began to eavesdrop immediately and didn't stop until I left. The dad seemed really outgoing and had this loud voice that was especially nice to hear because he was so sweet to his son. I'm guessing the kid was around 9 years old, and the dad was totally making jokes with him and the workers. I appreciated that. When the mom and grandma came in afterwards, the four of them together just made total sense to me. They just seemed like a real family, and their love for each other was so apparent. And what had me was the fact that each one of them was engaging in multiple conversations with one another. Stories about other family members that related to something learned were discussed as a group, and then there would be these separate criss-crossing back and forths among the four of them. Their dynamic just pulled me in. They talked about a lot of different things, and the mom even complimented the waiter on his haircut, which he reacted to with gratitude and surprise. The grandma also talked about how she'd made her kids clean the house with her and their father when they were younger. This was so they could use the $100 they saved by doing it themselves to eat together as a family at a restaurant afterwards. There was even a moment when I got to interact with them, which totally made my day. I knew they were super hungry because the topic of their excitement for the food came up after their order was taking a while. When they saw the server bring another dish of mine I had ordered, they ravenously asked about what it was and mentioned how good it looked. When their food eventually did come, it was a few dozen wings in this sauce, a few dozen wings in another sauce, and more fried chicken upon plates and plates of food. It's like, this family really knows how to enjoy themselves and go out to eat, and I loved seeing every minute of it. After I finished my beers and fried chicken, I wished them a great evening as I got up from my table to leave. It was sunny again by the time I stepped out onto the street to head back home on the subway. I don't think I could've asked for a better start to Pride month.

Inhale, exhale x 100.

Fake chewing.

There's free food in Conference Room 2.

"Can I handle the seasons of my life?"

From the song Landslide by Fleetwood Mac.

"You will know."

From the song Dreams by Fleetwood Mac.

"Now here you go again, 

you say,

you want your freedom."

From the song Dreams by Fleetwood Mac.

Why’d I.
Wide eyed.

Nonchalant.

"According to the American market research firm Datassential, Korean ingredients like kimchi, which is traditionally buried underground and left to ferment for months, now appear on 5.5 percent of menus in the United States, a jump of 59 percent in the past five years — particularly noteworthy since Americans of Korean descent constitute less than two-thirds of a percent of the total population."

From the May 14, 2019, New York Times article "How Sourness Has Come to Dominate Our Dining Habits, and Our Discourse." By Ligaya Mishan.

"Making lists of ideas, reading novels, scheduling time to sit down at your computer, researching new coffee shops at which to work, and establishing weekly word goals may seem like parts of writing, but they are not. They are procrastination, which, if you think about it, is actually writing in its purest form."

From the May 8, 2019, Daily Shouts of The New Yorker titled "What Is Writing and Does This Count as It?" By Mia Mercado.

"But for the first time, I don’t have a plan, besides to take care of myself."

From the May 3, 2019, Healthyish article "Christina Lecki On Leaving Reynard and What She's Doing Next." By Priya Krishna.

Impact.

"When you look to successful people you admire, study them not only for their victories and achievements, but also for how they overcame failures and changed as a result of them."

From the April 21, 2019, New York Times article "Why ‘Find Your Passion’ Is Such Terrible Advice." By Stephanie Lee.

Write what you want.
Eat what you want.

Word of the week: JOY

Still got it.

"Your love is holding on and it won't let go,
I feel it breaking out like an echo."

From the song Echo by Elevation Worship.

"I've decided I'm not giving up."

From the song Echo by Elevation Worship.

Plead.
Please.

"We were raised to really respect all religions and all peaceful people."

Said by Patricia Arquette in her April 29, 2019 episode of WHYY-FM's Fresh Air.

Food family.

I just discovered the Focus button on the bottom of Microsoft Word docs. And wow, my mind is blown.

This is how things happen.

Write like someone wants to read it.

It's not about that.

Cordless? What’s a cord?

"Our culture teaches us to focus on personal uniqueness, but at a deeper level we barely exist as individual organisms. Our brains are built to help us function as members of a tribe. We are part of that tribe even when we are by ourselves, whether listening to music (that other people created), watching a basketball game on television (our own muscles tensing as the players run and jump), or preparing a spreadsheet for a sales meeting (anticipating the boss's reactions). Most of our energy is devoted to connecting with others."

From the book The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van Der Kolk, M.D. Page 80.

Paying.
Pain.

"I was alone a lot, but I was never lonely. You hear that? It's quiet. You can hear your thoughts. You can hear what it is that's so important."

Said by Robin Roberts in her episode of Oprah's Master Class.

"I pull up to Coachella,

in boots with the goose feathers."

From the song Before I Let Go by Beyoncé.

If an elephant never forgets + Maya Angelou's quote about always remembering how people made you feel = Girl, bye

Daunt.
Don't.

Being an adult is running into someone on the street you haven't seen in a while and saying hi, but not once suggesting to hang out to catch up.

You sound old and out of touch.

"And no matter what I do,
I feel the pain,
with or without you."

From the song Tearin' Up My Heart by *NSYNC.

Frozen vegetables sold at supermarkets now commonly come in bags that can be directly steamed in the microwave.

This has been an absolute game changer for me. It's technology at its finest, folks, and I'm totally here for it.

The weather outside right now is perfection. It's 63° here in New York, which is warm enough to feel great without it feeling too hot out. I just came from sitting for a bit in the NYC AIDS Memorial Park at St. Vincent's Triangle, and people are definitely out basking in the sun. The park was filled with revelers, from a guy staring directly at the sun as he squinted and ate his bagel with cream cheese cut in half, to an older woman parading around in a mammoth black fur coat with a sable hat to match. It was glorious all around. Happy Friday!

Do you ever feel like you're just scrolling your life away?

"11:30pm in New York and people are leaving the party. Honey, they must be depressed."

Said by Grace Jones in her documentary Grace Jones: Bloodlight and Bami.

ADD. VICE.
Add vice.
Advice.

The past few weeks or so.

Word.

World.

Tidy.

"How do you control yourself in front of all this stuff?"

Asked by Action Bronson in the show F*ck, that's Delicious. Season 3, Episode 7.

Real moments.