"I'm gonna ride this motherfucker 'til the wheels fall off. Live your life."

Said by Martin Lawrence in his stand-up special Runteldat.

At this point,
it's smarter.
To let go,
bye martyr!

Tweaked.
Tweaker.
Obliques.
Bleaker.

The past few weeks or so.

Can't hear you,
can't see you.
Can't meet you,
won't do.
At sunrise,
be surprised.
Same bullshit,
it's true.

Well if you put it that way...

It exists.
Hit or miss,
stay true to your shit.
When running on empty,
stare at that list.

I have tteokbokki fever.

"There's a certain detachment that sensitive people must maintain to endure the harsh realities of this world."

Said by RuPaul in his audiobook Guru.

You’re not interesting.

Somewhere else.

You're my favorite new verb.

Already forgotten,
to forever stay rotten.

One-syllable life,
I need my pulse hyped.

Decision to incision,
no sneezing on that vision.

No more crumbs in bed,
dump that thing instead.

Private. Dining. Room.

Unclench, and feel that drench.

Color outside the line,
snap outside the frame.
Stir until it splashes,
rock a clean fade.

Beard.
Weird.
Feared.
Bleared.

Coughing into the pillow,
now everybody say wayo.

I am always watching the same movies on repeat.

...is that because things in my life feel like they’re on repeat too?

I felt a little bit of that.

"If you make a plan, life never works out that way. Look around us. Did these people think, 'Let's all spend the night in a gym?' But look now. Everyone's sleeping on the floor, us included. That's why people shouldn't make plans. With no plan, nothing can go wrong."

Said by the character Park Dong-Ik in the movie Parasite.

"Shin never became a novelist, but he named his first successful business, a company that marketed chewing gum, Lotte after Charlotte, the female character in Wolfgang von Goethe’s novel 'The Sorrows of Young Werther.' Mr. Shin was especially proud of the name Lotte, calling it 'the best choice in my life.'"

From the January 19, 2020 NYT Article: ‘Chewing Gum Tycoon’ of Lotte Group, Shin Kyuk-ho, Dies at 98. By Choe Sang-Hun.

People know.
People, no!

You know that scene in Beaches when CC Bloom bangs on her radiators with a frying pan so her super turns up the heat?

I think I've thought about her doing that literally every time I lay eyes on a radiator here in NYC. And this has been since I first watched it as a kid.

"Dear CC, we're spending summer at our beach house. It's very peaceful here. I get to ride horses and think a lot."

Said by Hillary in the movie Beaches.

Wash your hands x 100.

Other fish to fry,
other beans to boil.
Other cabbage to cook,
another thought to toil.

The past few weeks or so.

Descend.
Defend.
Demand.
Dreamland.

"I'm making spaghetti. You'd better come home soon."

Said by the character Eun Ho on the Netflix Korean drama: Romance Is a Book. Season 1, Episode 11.

The current soundtrack of living in NYC includes a lot of coughing and sneezing.

Invisible. An afterthought.

What even am I?

I had a perfect train day today. Well, at least half of one on my commute home that is.

I can't even remember when I started calling it this, but I gave the label perfect train day to those odd days when every subway I'd have to take would somehow magically show up the moment I got to the platform. This used to mean it would happen both in the morning and evening in simpler times when I didn't live in my current place and getting to wherever I worked only required taking a single subway line. But since I have to take 3 subway lines to get to my office now, perfect train days seem pretty much impossible. There's no way this could happen to six different trains in a single day of commuting. However, it did happen on my way home. The G, 7 train and D train all pulled into each station the moment I got there and I even managed to snag a seat every time. Sure, I worked a little late today and left my office at 8pm so that was probably why I got seats, but the timing still all matched up! It's been a while since I've had a perfect train day in any shape or form, so it made me pretty happy and was the highlight of my evening. It was a nice little reminder that it does still exist! Yes, exciting stuff going on here, folks.

Exactly what I needed.

When two characters in a Korean drama hug for the first time, you know it’s basically the point of no return.

The clock on the subway platform said my train would come in 12 minutes, and I really didn't want to wait that long. So I hopped on a different subway line, then took a bus, and then finally transferred onto another subway line to get home just now.

Why am I like this?

Dear Cup Ramen,

you know how I've been!

Happier now that you're here,

because you make life so much easier.

From hot water to spare,

noodle slurps usurps despair.

Know that you're my one and only,

thanks for the love you've shown me.

Merry Christmas!

I just woke up from a 14 hour nap and am really feeling the holiday spirit.

Fennel fronds.
It goes on and on.
Today's Christmas Eve.
So play that song.

May I?
Mayo!

The past few weeks while breaking in an iPhone 11.

Lost interest.

Dang.
When you swing.
Mouths hang.
Freedom rings.

"Where have I been all my life?"

Said by Ali in the movie Burlesque.

Going. To. Exhale. Out. Each. Word. At. A. Time.

It's a rainy Friday and that's fine with me.

Today is my dad's 68th birthday. Happy birthday, Appa!

"I guess I'm just a people person."

Said by Romana in the movie Hustlers.

Mood.
Food.
Rude.

Hope.
Cope.
Nope.

Always eating, never hungry.

Having heart and giving a shit is so attractive.

And neither of these things can be learned through a swipe.

Whatever happened to just letting arms be in photos?

I love being so busy at work all day that I don't have time to peruse the Internet or scroll through my phone for anything.

This is living.

My stripper name will be Tae-lap-ia-dance.

Unrelatable x 100.

Meh. See?
Messy.

So many streaming apps and things to watch, but all I have on repeat is Pose and Beaches.

Awkward.
Occupied.

I like to eat at night,
because that’s when it feels most right.
I tell myself,
sit tight because you’re in for the thrill of your life.

The movie Love Jones is everything.

I woke up in a panic this morning from a nightmare. I dreamt that I had just started working at a restaurant, and I was totally unprepared to work my first dinner shift. All of the staff were really happy and in good spirits as they ran around to get all of their pre-service work done. I watched everyone zipping by to sweep the floor or go stock the wine, and they were super encouraging to me as they wished me luck and gave me high-fives as I tied my apron that was a part of the uniform. Even the manager came up to me and was like, "you so got this!" just before she quickly disappeared with her assistant who was busily taking down notes. And then in that moment, I realized I didn't know the menu at all. How would I be able to sell the restaurant's food if I didn't even know what they served? How would I be able to answer a customer's question if they asked about how a certain sauce was prepared or wanted to know what farm their pork came from? I quickly grabbed the menu and began flipping through it with urgency. It was the size of a book, but felt more like a manual and each page had this hard lamination (really similar to the one I saw at Kellogg's Diner a few nights ago). To get through the night, I told myself that all I needed to do was be an expert on one entree. That way, I could just focus on trying to push that dish and not look like an idiot who didn't know anything about the restaurant's food. I began combing through each dish to decide on which one to pick, and it was in that moment when I realized I didn't know the table names and numbers. How the fuck would I know where to bring out each dish, or how to enter the order into the computer system? Things went pretty downhill from there, and I stood there trying to memorize the tables of my section as customers started to come and get seated. I felt so overwhelmed about everything. I eventually woke up before I actually approached any tables to take their orders. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing.

It’s not for you.

"How lucky are we? We create ourselves."

Said by Miss Aphrodite from the show Pose. Season 1, Episode 4.

So, you like just gave up on your dreams?

Shat.
Shatter.

I took my books and I ran out of there.